"Move your heart closer and closer to God, and he will come even closer to you. But make sure you cleanse your life, you sinners, and keep your heart pure and stop doubting."
James 4:8 TPT
Have you ever felt lonely? I don’t mean the type of loneliness where you literally feel alone. I am talking about the type of lonely where you’re surrounded by supportive family, encouraging friends, and an incredibly loving church family, yet you still feel like something is missing and you want “something more.”
I know the feeling very well. I was a 4th grade teacher for three years, and for three years I had that feeling of longing for something more. I loved my students and felt that what I was doing was making a difference, but I still found myself coming home every day stressed, unhappy, and feeling unfulfilled. At the time I thought it was because I didn’t love my job and wasn’t doing something that I loved doing. So, I decided to make a career change and start my own business doing something that I knew I loved, designing and making faith encouraging t-shirts. I was going to be happy now, I just knew it!
Seven months in, after all the excitement of something new wore off, the feeling was back. What am I doing? Why are things not going the way I planned? Why do I still feel unhappy and like something is missing? These feelings were secretly stewing around in my head, until one night while lying in bed next to my husband it all came to the surface. My husband asked how I was doing and without warning I started bawling. I couldn’t understand why I still felt unfulfilled and without a sense of purpose when I was so blessed to be doing something that I loved doing.
Well, after talking with Michael, a much-needed pep talk from a few friends, praying to God, and reading scripture, I can with confidence tell you why I was still feeling lonely. I wasn’t being a good steward of the talents and the job God gave me. Don’t get me wrong, I always wanted the business to be about encouraging others and leading them to Christ, but I wasn’t doing it selflessly. I was relying on my own plans and dreams, instead of relying on God and his plan for me. I was measuring my success to the number of followers and orders I was getting, instead of measuring my success to how I was growing spiritually. The truth is, you can have all the success in the world, but if it’s to bring you glory instead of God, you will never feel fulfilled. You can only find fulfillment in God.
So I am writing this blog today with full confidence, that the feeling of loneliness I was feeling, was a longingness to be closer to God. That “something more” I was craving was a desire for more Jesus. That feeling of being unfulfilled was a result of trying to find fulfillment in worldly things.
In those moments of loneliness, let it be a reminder that you need God and can’t live this life without Him. Let it be a reminder that if you draw near to God, He will draw near to you, fulfilling you in a way that no person or thing can ever do. Give everything over to God, and pray that He will help you use every talent and every blessing that he’s given you to bring Him glory, which in turn will bring you fulfillment.
Sometimes we get a little off track, but thank goodness for friends and family who get us right back on and for a God who is patient and merciful!
Andrea Vinson - Guest Blogger
I’m Andrea Vinson. I own a small business called, Disciple Designs. The name was inspired by the verse Matthew 28:19, which calls us to be disciples of Christ. With this is mind, we design apparel and other products that encourage women week to seek God’s truth, share their faith, and spread God’s love!
Here you will find a mix of encouraging and inspirational articles written from members within the Community of Christian Creatives.